Wednesday, February 16, 2005


Eulogy for a Gay Candian Mutant

Time for me to get my comics blog on. (SPOILERS for Wolverine #25.)

Well, I wasn't going to report on this until I had conformation, and, seeing as Kevin's word is pretty much bond to me... apparently, Mark Millar (bar-none hack, but that's another issue) is planning on killing off one of the X-Men in issue #25. And that X-Man? Is Northstar.

To fully understand what this means, you have to look back at Northstar's history in the comics. A lot of readers thought he was gay back in the days when those things didn't happen in comics. Even though Jim Shooter, Marvel's editor-in-chief, said there were no gays in the Marvel Universe, everyone threw a shit fit and tried to find some other solution when Northstar contracted a "wasting disease" that looked suspiciously like AIDS.

Potential gayness aside, however, Northstar is a very interesting character. He is arrogant, almost to a fault. He is impassioned about the views he holds, occasionally to the point of radicalism. He has a strong relationship with his twin sister, Aurora, who, due to a childhood of abuse, developed multiple personality disorder. He shows a strong paternal instinct, especially when he adopted an abandoned baby dying of AIDS.

Then he came out of the closet. And none of this mattered.

Seriously. At the hands of hack writers like Scott Lobdell and Chuck "Boobies!" Austen, the only things Northstar was good for were being fast, flying, and being gay, gay, gay. In this light, you can almost understand why he's getting killed off.

And yet, it's still inexcusable. One reason is that Northstar is, at the core of it, a good character. He has a lot of potential that, in the hands of a good writer, could go beyond the one-dimensional gayness. Another reason is that Northstar was, pretty much, the first superhero in any mainstream comic book to come out of the closet. He pretty much led to the establishment of other mainstream, ass-kicking gay heroes, such as Apollo and the Midnighter. And Marvel is going to kill him, just to satisfy the wants of Mark "Which Cultural Group Can I Piss Off This Time?" Millar.

Godspeed, Jean-Paul Beaubier. And fuck a bunch of Mark Millar.

Word. Millar's suckiness increases at an exponential rate. He's made it clear that he hates his readership; why do they keep reading?

And in Scott Lobdell's defense, he was the one who kicked Northstar out of the closet in the first place.
Yes, but Lobdell was also the one who made Northstar's brave battle cry, "I AM GAY!!!" It's a zero sum game.

And, apropos of nothing, my personal Mark Millar Trajectory of Hate:

-His first issues of The Authority, the ones with the twisted analogues of Jack Kirby and all the Marvel heroes: Annoyed.
-Issue summary of The Unfunnies #1, which played child porn for a joke: Slightly Pissed.
-Reading Chosen #1, #2, about a kid who turns out to be the Second Coming of Christ: Neutral, Leaning Towards Positive
-Reading an issue summary of Chosen #3, where, fooled ya! He's the Antichrist: Bloody Furious.
-Reading Wolverine #25: Flames... Flames...
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