Thursday, October 27, 2005
You Don't Have To Be An Absolute Paragon Of Health To Work Here...
...oh, wait. Yes, you do.
To discourage unhealthy job applicants, Ms. Chambers suggests that Wal-Mart arrange for "all jobs to include some physical activity (e.g., all cashiers do some cart-gathering)."
Wow. I haven't seen someone so directly flout the Americans with Disabilities Act since Scalia politely asked crippled people to crawl up staircases.
Life insurance, she said, was "a high-satisfaction, low-importance benefit, which suggests an opportunity to trim the offering without substantial impact on associate satisfaction." Wal-Mart refers to its employees as associates.
Okay, remember that Dilbert comic where the Pointy-Haired Boss announced that company life insurance has been cancelled because it increases the risk that greedy relatives will kill you? That wasn't meant to be implemented in the real world.
She wrote that "the cost of an associate with seven years of tenure is almost 55 percent more than the cost of an associate with one year of tenure, yet there is no difference in his or her productivity. Moreover, because we pay an associate more in salary and benefits as his or her tenure increases, we are pricing that associate out of the labor market, increasing the likelihood that he or she will stay with Wal-Mart."
See? We care about our workers! Mostly, we care about how quickly we can toss them out on their ass!
I honestly don't believe that any corporation can maintain this level of bureaucratic evil naturally. They must take night classes from C. Montgomery Burns.
To discourage unhealthy job applicants, Ms. Chambers suggests that Wal-Mart arrange for "all jobs to include some physical activity (e.g., all cashiers do some cart-gathering)."
Wow. I haven't seen someone so directly flout the Americans with Disabilities Act since Scalia politely asked crippled people to crawl up staircases.
Life insurance, she said, was "a high-satisfaction, low-importance benefit, which suggests an opportunity to trim the offering without substantial impact on associate satisfaction." Wal-Mart refers to its employees as associates.
Okay, remember that Dilbert comic where the Pointy-Haired Boss announced that company life insurance has been cancelled because it increases the risk that greedy relatives will kill you? That wasn't meant to be implemented in the real world.
She wrote that "the cost of an associate with seven years of tenure is almost 55 percent more than the cost of an associate with one year of tenure, yet there is no difference in his or her productivity. Moreover, because we pay an associate more in salary and benefits as his or her tenure increases, we are pricing that associate out of the labor market, increasing the likelihood that he or she will stay with Wal-Mart."
See? We care about our workers! Mostly, we care about how quickly we can toss them out on their ass!
I honestly don't believe that any corporation can maintain this level of bureaucratic evil naturally. They must take night classes from C. Montgomery Burns.
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OMG, dude, my dad BRIEFLY took a job at WalMart after he retired from the big computer company where he worked for 30 years. He was in his early 60s and they had him lifting 50-lb. boxes in a freezer all fucking day. Thank God he quit before the cardiac arrest set in. His stories about the brief time he worked there are HILARIOUS. Well, apart from the risk of death and whatnot.
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